Balance – Live Episode: Live in Austin!

From The Adventure Zone Wiki
Jump to navigation

"Live in Austin!," as it appears on the MaximumFun website, is a live episode of The Adventure Zone: Balance.

Synopsisedit | hide all | hide | edit source

Full transcript available here.

Earlier this year, Tres Horny Boys rolled up on Austin, Texas, and wove a tale of demons, dreamscapes and High School Drama. THIS IS THAT TALE.

Featured NPCs edit | hide | edit source

Featured Musicedit | hide | edit source

Featured Locationsedit | hide | edit source

  • Neverwinter High

Quotesedit | hide | edit source

Fifty Shades Greeneredit | hide | edit source

MERLE: I, uh, I been workin’ on a shrubbery. And it’s really cool.
MRS. ARIEL: Actually, it looks sick and bad and it doesn't look good. It looks sick and bad.
MERLE: No, no. Its one of those Japanese shrubberies that you trim to look sick and bad. It’s really healthy, because I dump fertilizer on it every day.
GRIFFIN: Uh, you can talk some game, but you’re shrubbery looks bad, and it’s gonna look bad when you turn it in unless you do some magic or whatever to it to make it look better to turn in.
TRAVIS: Don’t say ‘or whatever’ cause it's gonna be ‘or whatever’.
MERLE: Well, I’m a big believer in talking to my plants.
JUSTIN: Fuck you, I quit. I’m out. Is Taako in the building? Taako has left the building. Taako’s smoking with the cool kids.
MERLE: (...) [softly to a Gatorade he's pretending is a plant] Hi.
JUSTIN: (muffled) No. Stop.
GRIFFIN: Sorry, sorry. For the audience at home, [close to the mic] he’s fondling the plant.
MERLE: Y’know, uh, I’ve been nurturing you for a long time.
TRAVIS: [walks backstage]
JUSTIN: Hey Trav, get me one? Will you get me one too? I needed another Whiskey and Ginger Ale if anybody could hook a Justin up for this.
MERLE: Nobody really understands our relationship. Y’know—
JUSTIN: [joins Travis off stage]
MERLE: Y’know I believe in you. You have strong roots.
GRIFFIN: It’s starting to grow a few leaves.
MERLE: And someday, you’ll tower above all the other shrubs. And you’re going to [pause] blossom... into fullness. And ripeness.
GRIFFIN: Alright.
MERLE: And your sap… your sap shall runneth. Your sap overrunneth.
JUSTIN: [distant] You’re all complicit! (...) Bad people win when good people sit by and say nothing.
GRIFFIN: The plant grows and blooms and blossoms and is fine.
CLINT: (laughs)
Cookies help us deliver our services. By using our services, you agree to our use of cookies.