Ep. 17: Lunar Interlude 1 - Carnival Chaos

"I'm all jacked up on corn dogs and Dippin Dots! We're going to the carnival this week in... The Adventure Zone!"

Synopsis
''In this brief interlude between adventures, our heroes attend an office party — well, a carnival — at the Bureau of Balance’s lunar headquarters. They also hit up the Fantasy Costco, where they must match wits with their most fearsome mercantile foe yet. Taako makes a discrete trade. Merle tries on some cool-ass slippies. Magnus finally finds a friend.''

The Tres Horny Boys are celebrating with the rest of the Bureau of Balance at a carnival set up by The Director to celebrate the Midsummer Solstice, an event that is held every year. The highlight of the Midsummer Solstice is an eclipse that occurs every year at high noon, and which carries a spiritual importance to many religions. Griffin explains that everyone in the Bureau of Balance is wearing costumes, and he asks the boys what they're wearing for the celebration.


 * Magnus is dressed as Taako


 * Merle is dressed as Ursula from The Little Mermaid


 * Taako is dressed as Judge Lance Ito

They first stop by a food stand, where they meet Petrilda, a fried conjurer. She tells them she can fry up anything your heart desires, and Magnus orders an fried Unicorn horn and Unicorn dick to eat.

Petrilda holds out her hands in the air and a beautiful spiral ivory white unicorn horn appears in one hand, and, in the other, a unicorn penis. She dunks them both in a vat of golden oil, and she pulls out two cylindrical fried things in a little wire basket. She hands the fried horn and penis to Magnus on a styrofoam plate, and tells him to "mind the shards". Taako attempts to trick Petrilda into mentioning tortillas, thus furthering his attempts to discover tacos, but Griffin refuses to fall for Justin's tortilla trap.

Failing this, the boys leave the food cart to go play some carnival games. After playing a Toss-The-Little-Ring-Around-The-Bottle game, a carnival barker barks for the boys to come and see if they can knock down his cans.

The prize for knocking over these cans, the vendor says, is also 5000 gold pieces. However, seeing as the boys that don't have that much gold, the vendor gives them a freebie, but they'll owe him if they fail. He allows Merle a practice throw, and Merle manages to knock off the top three of the stack.

Merle demands another throw, double or nothing, and manages to knock over all the cans except one. Taako casts Mage Hand, and knocks over the last can. A alarm goes off, having detected magic, and the vendor calls the boys cheaters. Taako tries to rules lawyer by claiming that, technically, the only rule is that you knock over the cans, but the vendor doesn't listen and labels them cheaters by stamping 'cheater' on the boys' hands, banning them from all carnival games. Realizing they goofed up, Travis asks for Griffin to rewind time, so that they won't be labeled cheaters. Magnus steps up to the plate this time, and...he also fails to knock over all the cans. The vendor informs the boys that they now owe him twenty thousand gold pieces.

The boys wander back to the main part of the festival, where people are starting to get drunk and things are starting to get uncomfortable. Magnus gets his face painted to look like a kitty, and Taako asks "is there some adventure here or like are we just hanging?"

The Director's voice amplifies throughout the yard, and she calls for everyone's attention as the eclipse is about to start a minute or so from now. Leon walks around handing people, including the boys, special sunglasses so they can see the eclipse without hurting their eyes. Just as the sky begins to darken and the sun and the real moon align in the sky, the boys are blasted by a deafening shriek that immediately incapacitates everyone around them. Everyone falls to the ground limp, excluding the boys, and the sky turns pitch black. The boys are suddenly assaulted by a sonic blast, and Griffin has them roll constitution saving throws to see if they can withstand it. Travis rolls a 18, Justin rolls a 17, and Clint rolls a 20.

All three of them manage to withstand the blast, and retain their consciousness. Becuse they stayed conscious, the boys are able to distinguish some sounds in this calamity, and it sounds almost like twenty orchestras are all playing all at the same time around them. They also hear thousands, if not millions, of whispers, all happening at the same time as the orchestra. As the eclipse begins to blot out the sun, for a brief moment, the boys can see thousands of bright, white eyes fill the dark sky, all of them burning intensely.

Magnus heads over to the Director, and asks her if what just happened has happened before. Seeing that she's still a bit disoriented, Magnus tries to slap her awake. Now fully awake, the Director assures them that this has never happened before, and that they'll debrief about in her office later. The boys go around slapping everyone else awake, and, afterwards, head into the Director's office. She asks them what exactly they saw during the time she was unconscious. The boys tell her that they heard a cacophony of sounds, and thousands of white eyes staring at them. The Director informs them that no one on the surface has reported seeing what they just described, and that they were apparently the only ones who saw it. She commands the boys not to tell anybody else what they saw until they can figure out what they're up against, and that they must hasten their efforts to collect the Grand Relics.

[The Money Zone]

Now comes the time for shopping and character management. The boys head to Fantasy Gashapon first where they are greeted by Leon. They present their tokens to him, and bites them to make sure their not fake. Merle inserts his token into the Gashapon slot, and Clint rolls a 10. A shoe-box sized capsule comes out of the prize chamber, and Merle pops it open to find small slippers with aesthetic wings on them. Leon looks through his tome and tells Merle that these slipper are the: Merle tosses on the slipper, and Magnus puts his token in. Travis rolls a 11, and a small capsule comes out of the Gashapon. Inside the capsule is a green cloth glove meant for Magnus' right hand. Leon tells him that this glove is the: Magnus puts the mitt on, and Taako hands the token to Leon, who hands it back to him.Leon scolds Taako and tells him that he'll take his token away if he hands him it again. Taako complies and puts the coin into the slot. However, he starts having trouble which way to turn the crank, and an frustrated Leon tells him to turn it clockwise. Back to Taako, who has finally managed to figure out where to turn the handle. Justin rolls a 16, and a cylindrical shaped capsule comes out. Inside the capsule is a blue handheld folding fan with clouds on it. Leon flips through the tome and tells Taako that this is the:
 * Slippies of Haste: While you’re wearing these, if you ever find yourself in danger, or about to enter into combat, you will be able to move a little bit faster than those who are trying to get the drop on you. Meaning Merle will have advantage on all of his initiative rolls from now on.
 * Fletcher's Mitt: If you ever find yourself on the receiving end of an arrow or a crossbow bolt, this glove will give you a little help in avoiding or even catching the projectile being fired at you. Meaning Magnus now has +1 AC against ranged, non-magical attacks.
 * Gustmaster 5000: This fan is capable of once per day producing an incredibly powerful gust of wind that you can use to, say, knock back a foe, or put out a flame, or send some dishes flying, or anything you could do with a stiff breeze. This fan will allow you to produce that breeze, once per day. Which, in layman's terms, means that Taako can now cast the spell Gust of Wind using this fan once per day.Leon notices something different about Taako's Umbra Staff, and Taako tells him that it ate someone's wand. Leon takes a look at the Staff's handle, finding a sigil of a umbrella on it, and informs Taako that it is now capable of casting Featherfall on him and his party once per day.WIP

The Money Zone
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Featured NPCs

 * The Director
 * Leon the Artificer
 * Garfield the Deals Warlock

Featured Locations

 * Bureau of Balance

Quotes
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