Taako

Taako Taaco is a player character controlled by Justin McElroy. He is a high-elf wizard with a chaotic good alignment. He is an acolyte of Oghma, a god of wizardly shit, with a focus of Transmutation. Taako is a "simple idiot wizard," a kleptomaniac, and is allergic to peanuts.

He is originally from New Elfington. Prior to joining up with Merle Highchurch and Magnus Burnsides he hosted a traveling cooking show, 'Sizzle It Up with Taako' until 40 people died during his final show.

Powers and Abilities

 * Right-handed
 * Darkvision
 * Advantage on saving throws against being charmed
 * Immunity to magical sleep
 * Minor alchemy (may slowly transmute wood, stone, iron, copper, and silver into any one of the others)

Spells

 * Mage Hand
 * Ray of Frost
 * Shield
 * Sleep
 * Dark Vision
 * Charm Person
 * Thunderwave
 * Levitate
 * Detect Magic
 * Magic Missile
 * Melf's Acid Arrow
 * Blink
 * Rope trick
 * Scorching Ray
 * Disguise Self
 * Clairvoyance
 * Crown of Madness
 * Enlarge/Reduce
 * Phantom Steed (named Garyl)
 * Fireball
 * Shatter
 * Prestidigitation
 * Minor Illusion
 * Phantasmal Killer
 * Evard's Black Tentacles
 * Gust of Wind
 * Stoneskin
 * Knock
 * Cone of Cold
 * Wall of Force
 * Wall of Stone
 * Otiluke's Resilient Sphere
 * Planar Binding
 * Ice Storm
 * Leomund's Secret Chest
 * Arcane Eye
 * Cloudkill
 * Mislead
 * Bigby's Hand
 * Disintegrate
 * Banishment
 * Polymorph
 * Fire Shield
 * Fabricate
 * Dominate Person
 * Animate Objects
 * Greater Invisibility
 * Flesh to Stone
 * Tasha's Hideous Laughter
 * True Seeing
 * Hunger of Hadar
 * Drawmij's Instant Summons

Items
Big ups to @JimmyMarks for creating this.

Official Outfits
Usually, Taako is dressed as a typical elf wizard. Occasionally, the gang gets some new threads!

Petals to the Metal: The Mongoose!
In Ep. 23, Taako takes on the racing persona of the Mongoose, complete with mask. Very surprisingly dangerous. You know not everything has to be a joke.

Crystal Kingdom: Safety First!
Everyone, even Steven, gets a null suit to counteract the crystalization of Lucas's lab.

The Eleventh Hour: Skirt time!
In Ep. 41, Taako visits Fantasy Costco and gets a skirt. Length: flirty. Color: mauve or salmon. Don't even trip.

Chaos Stadium: Tuff Greg
In The Adventure Zone Presents: The Live Boston Stunt Spectacular, Taako takes on the wrestling persona of Tuff Greg. He's dressed exactly like a member of one of the crew of Chaos Stadium, 100%. It's a little meta.

Known Physical Traits
Disclaimer: The McElroys do not consider their versions of their characters any more "canon" than anyone else's - there is no obligation to stick to these in fanart, so please do not be rude to people who ignore these traits.

Early Life
Taako has been on his own since he was 12 years old and on. He made his living with troups of performers and mercenaries, trying to find a place where he belonged. He didn't have any marketable skills, couldn't fight, fly, or crow. He learned to make himself useful by being a chef, a skill his aunt taught him, to pay his way with the traveling crews. He learned during his travels to avoid fights as an instinct because he couldn't defend himself.

He taught himself magic from books he picked up and from wizards he traveled around with. He used his magic skills as a way to elevate his cooking and to peak up audience attraction for his traveling cooking show, Sizzle It Up with Taako. He toured many different cities with his show, keeping his traveling tour spirit in mind, with his driver/roadie/stage manager/right hand man, Sazed. Sazed thought Taako "hung the moon" and learned how to cook during their travels together. As the show grew in popularity, Sazed asked to do more and more with the show, even asking to co-host the show and change the name to Sizzle It Up with Taako and Sazed. Taako said no, due to merchandising issues and maintaining his brand.

Six years before Taako's adventure with Merle and Magnus begun, Sizzle It Up had entered Glamorsprings, a town that enjoyed the show before and had a turn out of 40 people. He prepared his famous 30 Garlic Clove Chicken for his audience that day. During the show he showboated his magical skills, transmutating things like salt into sugar, when he had a whole barrel of it, skinning chicken and then transmutating the chicken into chicken with skin on it. Unbeknownst to Taako, the chicken he had prepared has been poisoned by Sazed, and had killed everyone who had eaten it after his show. When the first person fell, Taako and Sazed ran. He assumed that the garnish of elderberries he had used on the chicken had been unwittingly transmuted into deadly nightshade, and he didn't noticed due to the similarities between the berries. The two of them drove for two days before looking back, and Sazed abandoned him as soon as he had the opportunity.

When going through his past memories with June, he encounters a lot of static in his memories. Aside from his cooking transmutation, Taako had only just learned enough magic to be dangerous before starting his adventures with Magnus and Merle.

Trivia:

 * Due to a magical accident with his first spell, everything he drinks tastes like key-lime Go-Gurt.
 * Taako has seen Magnus's ass sometime between the Craig's List Ad and the Here There Be Gerblins arc.
 * Taako was once killed by Magic Brian during a magical wizard duel in Wave Echo Cave.
 * In The "The Adventure Zone" Zone, Justin stated that Taako is gay. The reason that it had not been directly addressed in canon was because Griffin pointed out that his high-pitched, effeminate voice could be construed as a stereotype. Justin has reconfirmed this on Twitter.
 * While living in the dorms, Taako took the top bunk (above Magnus). Although he wears footie pajamas, Taako also sleeps in a sleeping sack due to his night terrors.
 * Prior to their adventure in Goldcliff, Taako had never been in a garage before.
 * The animal that most characterizes his state of being is a mongoose.
 * Taako's favorite candy is Ferrero Rocher.
 * Taako avoids cooking for people he cares about because he is afraid of poisoning them, a fear coming from the poisoning that happened when his TV show, Sizzle It Up with Taako, was still live.
 * Taako wears "flirty length" skirts for summer.
 * Taako enjoys fishing.
 * Taako has died eight times without crossing to the astral plane, according to  Kravitz.
 * Despite referring to the sweets he made for everyone during Candlenights as "macaroons," Taako's description of the ingredients used suggests he actually made macarons, which are almond-based unlike macaroons (coconut-based.) It is unclear if Taako is calling macarons "macaroons" (a common error) or if Justin does not know the pronunciation difference.
 * All of Taako's spells are exquisite.
 * Taako trusts no one (as of this episode).
 * Kravitz is a love interest of Taako's as of their date in Episode 50.
 * Taako is over 65 years old.

Items Taako has stolen:
 * Gold and Silver pieces (taken from a dead gerblin) - ended up splitting them with the rest of the party
 * Sack full of Golden Teeth (stolen from Yeemick's corpse, another gerblin)
 * Magic Boots of Striding and Springing (stolen from Thardin's corpse) - Given to Magnus
 * 320 Gold (stolen from a lock box)
 * Enchanted feather duster (stolen from Killian)
 * Bag of coins (stolen from Davenport)
 * Golden tiara (stolen from empty train car) - sold to Fantasy Costco
 * Silver serving set (originally belonging to Angus, stolen from empty train car) - gave 3 forks back to Angus, sold to Fantasy Costco
 * Briefcase (stolen from empty train car)
 * Stun baton (stolen from unconscious goblin ruffian)
 * Kravitz's heart

Known Components of Tacos
Taako is on a noble quest to find a perfect alternative to a sandwich in all of its cheesy goodness.